So. Guess who hates the fucking country she's in right now, but which shall remain nameless for now because I'm pretty sure I had to sign something to the extent of "if you talk shit about this place you won't like the consequences" when I came in? THIS whiny wanderer!
Honestly, Asia and me don't seem to go together in any capacity. So please, next time I start talking about planning a vacation to any Asian country, stop me and remind me of this moment. I'm begging you. It's like the last 6 weeks went too well, so now we're just piling on all the bullshit at once.
After almost 30 hours of sitting around, standing in lines, and trying to get comfortable in economy class for 10+ hours, I finally arrived where I am. Though I'm pretty sure that was already a close call, considering the last plane was held together with duct tape (I swear to god, we weren't allowed to board yet and were all standing in front of the plane watching the guy trying to fix it to the wing with his walkie talkie) and apparently only had oxygen masks for those passengers smuggling sharp objects in their hand luggage (please refer to Facebook for details). The hotel was alright, not exactly what I would have gotten in Germany for that very, very European price, but okay. Only their credit card terminal was broken. And considering the amount of money you can get out of ATMs here is limited and I wasn't expecting to have to pay cash, that made for an unexpected adventure trip to the nearest ATM. I swear I'm gonna get run over by...some sort of vehicle one of these days here. Let's just say streets, sidewalks, traffic, traffic laws - all very loose concepts here.
First tour the next day. Weather: complete shit. I thought monsoon was supposed to be over by now, but apparently I was misinformed. And word to the wise (or, you know, tour guides all over): when you're swimming around a lagoon while it is pouring, trying to convince yourself that you're still having a good time, the "OMG, it's raining, you're going to get wet!" joke gets old after...well, the first time you make it.
When I came back to the hotel that night, I was a bit surprised that my AC was turned off. Turns out: on Sundays there's only enough electricity to keep the lights going. Via a generator. So it's 30°C, what feels like 97% humidity and the AC isn't working, there's no warm water (which is great when the second-most popular joke of the day was "If you're passing a warm spot when you're swimming it's probably because someone just peed in the lake") and you're not allowed to throw your toilet paper into the toilet (also something I'm never, ever gonna get used to in Asia). Plus: mosquito in my room, so now half my arm is swollen up and if I don't get malaria, I'll probably end up with dengue fever or something knowing my luck.
Next day: complete touring chaos. Was placed on the wrong boat, when I realized it and complained that I really didn't want to do yesterday's tour AGAIN, it turned out the tour I had booked wasn't even scheduled for that day, so they were looking for a boat and a tour guide for me for almost 2 hours until we finally got going, just for the tour guide to have no idea what islands we were actually supposed to go to...and I'll spare you the rest. More rain, more confusion, more time on the boat than on any island, bla bla.
So I was kinda looking forward to leaving this place behind and move on. Got up early, went to the ATM (cause surprise, next hotel wants to be paid in cash AGAIN), got a whole bag full of stuff from the bakery for a buck, basically sat on my packed suitcase....and then my ferry got canceled. I was able to get a room for another night at my hotel, but I had to switch rooms and the new one smells totally like mildew and in order to get the dampness under control I had to crank up the AC to max, so now I'm sitting here in long pants and a hoodie, because it's so cold (update: yeeeaaah, probably shouldn't have complained about that. Had another brownout and now the AC isn't working at all anymore). Took a tricycle to the ferry office to find out what happens next only for my tricylce driver to have no idea where that actually was, so he randomly dropped me at every ferry office he could find until we finally made it to the right one. So now I'm stuck here, I'm paying for 2 hotel rooms, I'm paying for a tour tomorrow that I'm not gonna be on because I'm stuck on the wrong island and can't get in touch with the tour operator, I have no idea if I will actually make it to the right island tomorrow because I won't know until the morning if the ferry will even run and if I do, it's basically just to do one tour before I have to take a van all day to my next destination. If that van ever runs, because for some reason every single day is fully booked - only on Friday I am the only person booked on any of the departures and they need 5 people to run the service. So hey, maybe I'll get stuck in the next fucking place then.
Have I mentioned I hate this country? I'd say "hey, it can only get better from here", but I said that yesterday and look where it got me. It's like all the fears I had beforehand about it are coming true. And I still have 12 more days before it's time to leave. Next time I'm gonna listen to my gut again. Asia, you and me - we're done.
UPDATE: Yeah, ferry didn't run AGAIN today. So I had to switch to yet another mildew-infested room but hey, at least the van service that I won't need now finally confirmed my booking and now wants money from me, so there's that. Caved earlier and simply bought an effing expensive plane ticket for tomorrow to somewhere that's not here, but knowing my luck, they're gonna close the airport down or something before I even make it to my flight...
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